'Happy Birthday, Tim'

It is Tim’s birthday today and he took this picture of part of the ‘Sleeping Beauty’ section on the Cromford Canal when we stayed in Derbyshire last weekend.

A few nights ago, I lay awake pondering as my mind touched on all the loving and uplifting gifts Tim brings into our lives.

Tim is a clever and experienced electrical installation design engineer, and he has worked hard since he undertook his apprenticeship at Rolls Royce in the 1980s. He is creative and diligent at DIY and electrics in our home, tackles huge tasks with fortitude and chips away until they are complete. He keeps our vehicles clean and in good running order and I often return home to find housework and laundry done, as a lovely surprise.

Emotionally, I have never been nurtured like this and I am deeply grateful. He hugs me, listens attentively, makes me laugh every day and we natter with ease whilst appreciating the comfortable silence and comfort in adventuring and also doing nothing together.

It was Tim’s idea that I went out into the world as a funeral celebrant and it was inspired. I know that I couldn’t do what I do without his support and encouragement, and he instinctively knows when I need my spirits lifted with an adventure or a surprise and he often brings flowers home.

I love that he listens whenever I have an idea, no matter how outlandish some of them are.

Tim is humble and dislikes fuss or drama, so this post may well make him cringe, but as I lay quietly that night thinking of his strength, loyalty and loving kindness, I felt compelled to speak out.

Middle-aged and older men are being forgotten and it is not trendy to talk about them. Words like ‘privileged’ and ‘patriarchal’ are bandied about with ease and that doesn’t sit right or feel balanced. It is also an effective way to shut down any kind of debate or conversation.

Men, like Tim, who are kind, gentle, loving, hard-working and selfless, spend their lives working hard and putting their families first.

They have become invisible.

Men like this understand that a rich life, filled with purpose and interests, creates a legacy for their families. Their kind natures are nurtured and moulded by all the life choices they make. Everything they do carries the goal of making sure their loved ones are provided and cared for.

They know how to love, touch and open others' hearts and what a difference their unconditional love can make. They take responsibility for their choices and actions, serve their loved ones and nurture them.

Love like this is a gift without end.

Their loving foundations are a springboard for others to be themselves and to reach and achieve their potential.

It is time to champion their contribution to our lives and our societies.

💛🌻‘Happy Birthday, Tim’. Shine on my beautiful man. 🌻💛

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An excerpt from this week’s Thoughtful Tuesday, ‘Twisting’, for you to listen to.

My love to you all. 💛